Taking a brief break...

Okay, I'll be taking a breather from my current Neverwinter Six post. If everything goes fine, it means I'll be able to finish what I've started in the 2nd post. For now, I decided to put my nation into the limelight. Hopefully for the right reason.

I blame the Smongfather

SM Ong (please note that his initials do not indicate any sexual perversity) is at it again. As if trolling politically correct Singaporeans wasn't enough, he decided to troll Der Gwee himself. Interestingly enough, Der Gwee may have raised a legitimate question: Who is to blame for the Singlish culture, assuming that it has really compromised the standard of spoken (and perhaps to a certain extent, written) English?

Before that...

This is the real Smongfather

This is the English version of the Smongfather.
Namely... okay, the picture is self-explanatory anyway.

With the trolling done, let's continue

This post is NOT about analyzing how Singlish came to be. I'll leave this job to the MOE (or whoever else having nothing better to do. Including Der Gwee himself of course). Rather, this is my take on a pervasive culture no different from this video below.

If the stereotypical Singaporean enjoys using Singlish, it means the stereotypical Brit enjoys swearing. As you can see, the standard of language used in the video above is of a higher grade than Singlish. Does it make itself anywhere more acceptable than Singlish? I'm pretty sure the answer is no.

An underground culture already formed

While I've yet to receive an invitation from the Smogfather to be Aitor Karanka's strategist, I won't be surprised to hear people saying that Brits are basically loud, drunk, and swearing happy. If we're talking about the English majority of the United Kingdom, it can be split into two halves. The southern part is basically the closest thing to Singapore. In other words, it's a metropolitan south (note that London is truly in the south). As for the north, it's mostly a working class majority region. The more familiar names would include Manchester and Merseyside. Then we have the rougher end consisting of places like Newcastle upon Tyne, the City of Sunderland, and Middlesbrough.

I do not know how accurate the next statement is, but there are moments where my friends at Middlesbrough expressed their displeasure over tabloids like the Sun. Their reason? The target of their ire is owned by Tory sympathizers and based in the English south. And it doesn't really help that during the Hillsborough tragedy, the Sun decided to profit from the pain and anguish of the grieving. If you're a Liverpool/Everton fan here in Singapore, you may know what I'm talking about. If you're a local Scouse (i.e. an actual Scouse instead of a foreign Liverpudlian/Evertonian), you'll know I'm not lying. If any Singaporean thinks I'm lying, please try asking Joey Barton if you happen to see him at The New Paper Sports Bar. After all, he's a Scouse like Stevie G (author's warning: Please be warned. There is only one Joey Barton for a reason).

Why I am talking about England out of nowhere is very simple: When we look at the standard of our English, we must also understand that there's nothing great about swearing in perfect English. Which is something we'd most likely see in certain parts of England at the very least. After all, I'm pretty sure Emma Watson isn't a Geordie.

In every society, there will be such a thing called underground culture. It may come in the form of entertainment when it comes to the Japanese, it also includes what I'd call a slang culture. Yes, you've guessed it. Singapore also has its own slang culture in the same way you can expect Andy Murray to use the word willy in private conversation.

Slang culture: To be or not to be?

It's pointless for us Singaporeans to ask whether Singlish should exist in the first place. We will only end up starting a debate which neither party can win. It's like the people of New Jersey debating whether Chris Christie should outlaw the usage of the New Jersey salute just because Governor Christie himself is a Republican.

The notion of banning Singlish will have serious implications. Firstly, it will only create a rebellious generation. Already, the students here in Singapore are chafing under the dog-eat-dog race which well-meaning parents have unwittingly fostered (note that I don't use the term rat race because I want to be politically incorrect here). Secondly, any calls to ban Singlish means the campaigners are more intelligent than the government. Which is absurd, to say the least.

So let us destroy any possibility of a slanging match between "intelligent" people (something which American politics are sadly infamous for) and let us accept the slang culture for what it is. After all, we already have enough social vices to go around with. When was the last time your neighborhood loan shark decided to say hi?

Social responsibility?

This is NOT to say that Singlish should be abused. It's like imagining Prime Minister David Cameron having a pint with Prince Harry. As a British, Mr Cameron does have the freedom and right to say "Hey, Harry. Do you know the Chinese actually brewed their medicinal wine from a deer's willy?"

Try imagining Mr Cameron saying the same thing to the ambassador of China in the UK. There's no way he would be that stupid.

Likewise, no one should discourage any Singaporean to use Singlish at their own discretion. Assuming any Singaporean to be dumb enough not to understand this means assuming all Singaporeans to be equally dumb in the same context, A*STAR scholar or no A*STAR scholar. Unless you don't regard yourself as a Singaporean.

With that being said, education should always start from the smallest things. As educators, teachers should make an effort to tell their students two things:

1. Singlish shouldn't be avoided like a plague because it's already there.

2. Using Singlish is all about exercising the freedom of expression, using English is all about earning respect from others.

Our students need to know, firstly and foremost, the actual importance of English before they should learn how to embrace Singlish. You can't expect a teacher to say "oh, using Singlish is wrong." Why is it wrong in using Singlish? Is using Singlish a show of being uneducated despite even A*STAR scholars using it in private conversation? Likewise, you don't expect a teacher to say "using English is the correct way" without explaining the reason why. The difference between a working adult and a student lies in maturity. We shouldn't underestimate the intelligence of our children, but we shouldn't overestimate their state of maturity as well.

Secondly, the parents should play an important part as well. You say "Singlish is for low-class people", but have you ever told your kids the real importance of using proper English? Are you guilty of fearmongering when it comes to this issue? If you can speak proper English at home, you don't have to fear whether your kids will end up speaking Singlish overnight. Observe and educate, but do not judge. Everyone has a rebellious streak, especially teenagers. There is no point for parents to put themselves into their own Neverland just because we're nearing 51years of independence.

On the other hand, parents have to be careful in their words also. If you have no problem using Singlish, it means you have the duty to educate your child in this aspect.

Children and students, asking questions won't kill you. Thomas Edison was a famous inventor. We all know he was born a genius, but how many of us actually knew that he was kicked out of school just because he enjoyed asking questions in class?

Note: A thousand apologies to every reader of mine. It seems that I am now having symptoms of flu with a headache and a tingling sensation along my nasal area. Therefore, I decided to end this post here despite having other stuff to say. And when I say other stuff, I mean it literally.

P.S: I suddenly recall a documentary done by ABC entitled Dumb, Drunk and Racist. Apparently Singlish by itself isn't really that bad after all. Just don't ask me whether anyone at Charles Sturt University truly understand Singlish. I don't profess to have a local Singaporean girlfriend graduated from there.

Add P.S: Oh, and one more thing. Below is the song I envisioned for my new dark fantasy work.

Lyrics